Sunday, January 9, 2011

A bad case of the blues, ultramarine blues that is . . .

The holidays are over, winter is still here, it is perpetually cold and I feel like I am going out of my mind.  Sounds like the January blues are in full swing and the way my mood swings are tracking, one had best be ready to move in a hurry lest they get bitten by a woman craving a diversion, preferably a non edible one.  January is one of my least favourite months.  Truthfully, the period running from about December 01 right up until about mid February wins the award for being the worst period of the year in my books.  There is just something about this period of the year that depresses me, especially after the December holidays are just a memory along with some left over glitter still showing up on the carpet.

So, what to do?  How can I put my time to good use and hopefully enjoy it without having to go out in the cold or bake up another batch of brownies to entice friends up for a chat?  I love having friends drop by, but I do need quiet times to allow myself to think, plan, prepare for what I hope might transpire in the future.  This is my time to dream about what I want to do and see if I can find ways to make these happen.  I have been reading a number of books lately on using positive thinking to make your hopes and dreams actually happen.  Not one to overlook any method that might bring about a change in lifestyle, I read the books, recite the mantras and hope for the best.  So, how is that working out for me?  I actually am not able to say just yet.  I am still new to this thinking process, the one of positive thinking bringing about good karma, so I will let you know how this all turns out.  I figure that I need to practise quite a bit more before I become proficient enough to bring about funding for a new, large flat, a snazzy wardrobe full of clothing that is colourful, fun and fits, as well as a number of gallery showings of my artwork which suddenly has become trendy and very much in demand.  Positive thinking, believe in yourself, imagine how it will feel, picture yourself wearing that snappy little party frock at a gallery showing your work.  I am doing the positive thinking full out,  so it is bound to happen soon, right?  While we are at it, maybe I could find a way to attend some fun concerts, nights out at the theatre and maybe an opera or two.  Might as well dream big if I am going to do justice to the theories in these books.  Does someone have a tiara that I might borrow just in case a prince or visiting dignitary comes to call unexpectedly and asks if I might join him in the royal viewing box?  As I mentioned previously, if I am going to test out this positive thinking business, I really do want to test it out thoroughly.

Meanwhile, I am sitting here, along with Molly Cat, looking around the flat trying to find something to amuse myself.  That can be dangerous.  I like to live a somewhat unconventional life, at least in my dreams.  The reality of my world is that I am pretty predictable, a creature of habit.  So, up at 7:30 a.m., feel Molly, shower, clean the bathroom, dress, breakfast, pot of tea, computer check in, tidy up and then the day is mine for the most part.  I might have the odd appointment or two through the week, a trip to the shops to pick up essentials and maybe a trip to the art supply shop.  That is where I get myself into trouble.  When all the staff greet you by name as you walk in the door of the shop, you know that you frequent the premises maybe a little too often.  But, what is a gal who paints supposed to do when she runs out of naples yellow, ultramarine blue and bleached titanium?  And so, I find myself in the paint section tossing tubes of various colours, in addition to the ones that I set out to purchase, into my basket.  Nose to the air, I sniff out any sales items much the way Edward would track Bella's whereabouts in Twilight.  I love a sale, but a sale in an art supply shop is the ultimate boost to my sagging morale.  SoI will just say that on Saturday, my morale got a wonderful boost, all the shop employees were especially welcoming and I behaved relatively well and stayed on budget.  The cashier and I both watched the ascending total as he scanned each item in my basket.  Then, we both gave a sigh of relief when he applied the discounts on the items which brought the total back down to where it needed to be.  Oh, Saturday's sale was a good one!  I have to admit I was a little embarrassed when I heard one lady remark to another, "When you see that lady out here, you know there has to be a good sale going on."  I have to admit that I smirked when I heard this, that my careful purchasing had been noted by other customers was also a bit of a morale boost.  I am a careful shopper, but truthfully, I will do without some necessities in order to keep my art supply cupboard fully stocked.  Please, do not worry yourselves! Molly Cat will never be without anything she needs, I will never be without extra tea reserves in the pantry and having soup on a daily basis is not considered drudgery in my world.  It really is all a matter of what means the most in your world.  Not to say that a upward climb to the next level and being able to afford it would be a bad thing and not be welcomed.

I now have a good supply of canvas that should keep me going for a while.  My paint supply has been replenished and a few new colours added into my bin holding all the tubes of various hues.  I have been painting one canvas after another lately and some days, I have been known to work on and complete as many as four paintings of a reasonable size.  I like canvases that measure 11" x 14 " but am tempting fate and moving up to more in the 16" x 20" ones and I am looking lovingly at one that is 24" square.  That will be for a very special painting that I am planning out and doing a little research on just the right colours to use.  In fact, there will be two done in that particular size that I hope to hang over my computer desk within the next week or two.  There are just so many things that I want to paint right now.  I am starting to feel that there is still life in this little flat where Molly and I live.  Having something to occupy your time with productively is a good thing, but when you really enjoy what you are doing is the frosting on the cake.  Liza said that it sounds like I have been bitten by the painting bug.  Yes, I have!  There is nothing nicer in my world these days than to have some good music playing in the background, Molly Cat sitting at my feet and me, I would be the one in the multi coloured t-shirt painting great swathes of colour on a multitude of canvases that are propped up against the walls, drying.  This is my world, the place where I feel comfortable, content and relaxed.  It might not be the right place for you, but for Molly and me, we are quite content. 

Do I still think that I need to participate in the positive thinking exercises promoted in my reading material?  Yes, I do think that the power of positive thinking has a place in my life.  I really would like to see my artwork hang in a gallery and be sold to an admirer some day.  I would like to wear a snappy little cocktail frock on an evening out on the town with a proper gentleman who would open doors for me and treat me like a princess.  We all have our dreams, and there is nothing to be ashamed of in admitting that.  Dreams keep us motivated, make us work a little more diligently to reach our goals in life.  Keeping your dreams within the realm of being able to be reached is wise, but every once in a while, you just have to let loose and ask the universe to bring on the good karma, full force, and be ready to have a good time.  Even if your dreams do not materialize, you have had a wonderful time thinking about them and putting them together right down to the last detail.  That is kind of the way I work when I am painting.  I start out with one thing in mind and my dreams take me down another path that might just be a little more fun and teach me a few things along the way.  Maybe this January will not be like all the others that I have crawled through.  This just might be the one where the artist in training turns into an artist with paintings in galleries.  Stranger things have happened!

Have a great week!

Sincerely,  Rutheemac
P.S. I have put up the three latest paintings from my gallery.  The colours are a little brighter, maybe thoughts of spring weather were playing with my sub conscious whilst I was painting.  LOL Spring cannot come soon enough for me!  But, truthfully, although the winter has seemed relentless, it really has not been a terrible one compared to what others experience every year.  Hope you enjoy a glimpse of spring in this trio of paintings done on a cold wintery afternoon.

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